By "restrictions," I refer to the necessary precautions we must take to ensure that the virus does not spread to us or through us. My husband has Stage 4 prostate cancer. My cousin is in hospice with cancer. Our two families are the best of friends and the two of them (my cousin and my husband) used to have gigs playing guitar together a few times a year. We used to go to listen to live music, in town and out of town, and they hosted house concerts as well. None of this is safe during the pandemic, regardless of outdoor venues and social distancing guidelines. The photo is of a country road in Southwest Illinois, taken yesterday evening on a drive. On a normal Saturday evening, we would have been accompanied by my cousin and his wife, and our destination would have been somewhere to listen to music. While we are fortunate to have classic VWs to take out for a ride, and being able to afford the gasoline, it is still a lonely road. The sun is setting on their lives, and we can't spend these last days together doing what we all love.
September 28, 2020
This is usually the time of year, as a teacher, where I am enjoying the end-of-year events and celebrations with my students as well as getting started on planning for the next school year. None of that is happening this year. Some of it is due to precautions and health protocols. Some of it is just due to the level of burnout I am feeling.
The elementary school where I teach is not holding any big schoolwide events such as field day or moving up ceremonies. We are doing some virtual events for Kindergarten and 4th grades, but since I don't teach them, I am not really involved at all. I usually do not enjoy field day, but it would've been nice this year since so much of the joy has been removed from school right now. Who knew I would miss sweating for 4 hours, being dehydrated, and getting a sunburn while my 7 year old students ran relay races!?
We aren't able to invite families into our classrooms this year, either. So our traditional end of the year open houses and celebrations are not happening. Here's where my burnout comes in - I could try to hold something over video meetings, but I just can't bring myself to organize another virtual activity. I just don't have it in me.
Similarly, I have no mental or emotional bandwidth right now to start thinking about next year. Normally, I'd be excitedly brainstorming new projects with colleagues, and talking about new things we wanted to try or old things to change or replace.
May 24, 2021