This past Sunday, I biked to a nearby town to my college ... and visited a small vinyl store in a man’s garage. The bike ride was long and tiring, but I did not know what to expect when I reached this man’s house on a suburban street. Once I arrived, I was instantly surprised by this man’s collection of vinyl, turntables, and jukeboxes that reminded me of the music I grew up listening to. It was a welcome sight to see a place not seriously affected by the Coronavirus. I asked him how he manages to have a small business like this during COVID; he said sales of turntables rose as people stayed inside more and saw an influx of people asking him to fix their machines. He seemed in excellent spirit, singing along to the music and showing off individual records. I thought about this experience and the joy it brought him to discuss music and show me his turntables and it reminded me of the power of these compositions. The music itself has become increasingly important to sustain my mental health and let me for a second forget what we are going through and be submerged by the music. And as I reflected on my music dependence, I realized how important it has become in a Pandemic. We listen to music to remember the past and the times that things were normal; we listen to music to daydream, remind us of people, and marvel at the artist’s talent. Once an artist releases a song, it becomes a constant, does not waver or die, and is cemented in history. We should recognize this with all the uncertainty in the time of COVID; we are provided with a haven that can take us out of the current crisis.
October 20, 2020
I think I have a bit of PTSD from the past 15/18 months. Last week I acted in a manner that scared me enough that I chose to make some significant changes to my daily routine. I think I acted the way I am finally significantly feeling the stress of the last year. Although I have established a better routine in some regards, I have also picked up some bad habits to help me cope and I need to break them. I should not be surprised that I am even more anxious and depressed now that things are opening back up then I was in the middle of this. But part of me is surprised. I think when you are forced to change your everyday routine after a long period, then the adjustment to go back is hard. And I am having a difficult time adjusting to anything that resembles a normal. There is also a deep, deep resentment for all the thing my family and I have lost in the past 15 months.
June 23, 2021