This has been a tough week. Covid fatigue is one thing. Anxiety about the elections another...those feelings I’ve been dealing with fine, I thought. After flipping back and forth between the town halls and such different visions of what represents America and who we are, and who we want to be, left me reeling. I don’t watch the news so am pretty insular to such a stark difference. It left me numb And unmotivated to do much... my screen time is up as I surf YouTube for something, anything to lift my spirits ... Well not just anything as cute puppy and adorable kittens feel too immature and wasted. I need knowledge, I need to learn something, I need to feel that somehow in the midst of all the divisiveness in the country knowledge is power and I can take back mine some how. So tiptoeing past TikTok, no politics, and no conspiracy theories is not necessarily an easy journey. A crystal in my window gave me this prism on the wall. The colors danced and shimmered and got lighter and brighter from moment to moment. It gave me hope that the dark cloud i felt settling over me might be held at bay somehow. If the smallest bit of light can change a dull flat empty white space to a reminder of joy, and color however brief the encounter, then maybe there can be some sort of symbiotic energy transfer to my soul. Then i realized I have a choice each day to decide if I want to carry forth the lasting shimmer of possibility, or the blank emptiness of the white void. That choice is mine to make, and is the start of taking back my power.
October 27, 2020
Okay, en un principio la economía en mi familia estaba bien, de hecho no nos preocupábamos en nada, pero ahora si nos apura. Estas ultimas semanas hemos escaseado en cuestión de comida, nuestra alacena esta vacía y el refrigerador igual, pero al menos entiendo la situación. Mis padres acaban de pagar nuestras para nada baratas colegiaturas, aun faltan los libros y en los casos de mis hermanas las playeras del uniforme. Pero vamos, se que estoy mejor que muchas personas que viven en situación de calle o que no tienen ni siquiera trabajo. Lo mejor que puedo hacer es comprender la situación y asimilarlo.
August 24, 2020