Some days, when the walls are closing in, and I've not laid eyes on another human being for over a week other than my spouse and the few silent, masked souls wandering the aisles on a Tuesday morning at Walmart, I feel that this pandemic--already entering its sixth month--is never going to end. I feel trapped. Trapped in a situation over which I have no control. How long must I remain sequestered? When will I be able to safely visit and wrap my arms around my elderly mother, my sons and my grandchildren? When can I venture anywhere without the vital mask and hand sanitizer? How many more will die and/or suffer the ravages of COVID-19 before an effective vaccine becomes available? How can this possibly be happening in the 21st century? Trapped. Trapped in a nightmare. Unable to escape. Unable to move forward. Time marches on, and yet, it stands still. Remember bibliophile Henry Bemis in the "Time Enough at Last" episode of Twilight Zone? Henry finally gets his wish to be able to read whenever and whatever he wants; however, he accidentally breaks his glasses, so his plans and dreams are shattered. He's all alone with nothing enjoyable to occupy his time. At some point during this pandemic, each of us, unfortunately, can relate to poor Henry Bemis. Time was on our side, but COVID-19 reared its ugly head to impede our hopes and ambitions.
August 4, 2020
It’s thanksgiving tomorrow and I usually travel by Greyhound to visit my brother and his family in Holland MI Not going this year and will spend thanksgiving alone with a bottle of white Zinfandel , a pumpkin pie and my cat Willow. Am thinking of all the things I have lost this year including my sense of safety: my mom, a favorite cousin, the bike trail along Muskegon Lake is flooded, coffee shops closed, public library has pick-up only (thank goodness for that), my writers group disbanded, fear of getting on public transportation and I have no car. And just chatting with people I met during the day in my apartment building, wandering around the city, and hanging out at the local coffee shop. We had our first snow yesterday and it was beautiful but a warm front blew through and it is all gone this morning, Rain and clouds expected today and the gloomy weather does nothing for my mood, And the fear that every persons path you cross could be harboring a deadly virus is unnerving to say the least. I’m emotionally exhausted,
November 26, 2020