Just went to see this house in Coventry decorated for Christmas. The gentleman who owns the place lets people walk up his driveway to see the incredible display he sets up every year. People come from miles around, notified about it mostly via Facebook word of mouth. Its a crazy busy light display with different colored lights blinking and twinkling and circling everywhere you look. But it was joyous and it really lifted my spirits for awhile. This has been a hard holiday season. I see in the paper how businesses and families are struggling, and we can't get together like we normally would to celebrate the end of this awful year. I can't wait to get that vaccine so I can see my mother and father again in person.
December 25, 2020
This week was Mom’s birthday. Though she’s no longer here I often feel her presence. I decided to celebrate with a quick round of “Happy Birthday to you...” and made a wish and blew out the candle as her proxy on the special day. I took this picture to share with my sister and to see how she might have marked the occasion. When I looked at the picture I was struck by the impermanence of our presence here on earth, and how many spirits may be with us, or not... the candle reflection is there, but not the shadow of the flame. Isn’t a shadow supposed to be one of life’s given? The constant threat of Covid, and the unknown seemed particularly poignant in that flame and missing shadow. It left me questioning all kinds of things like what’s real? Can you trust your eyes? Can you trust pictures? What else do we think should be a certain way and isn’t? How long will Covid last? When will I feel safe again! Will I ever feel safe again? And yet there’s an element of comfort here as well. That is that I can stand alone and burn brightly knowing she’s there, even though I can no longer “see” her. Maybe it’s the “shadow of doubt” that’s missing? Maybe it’s a sign she’s still with me? I hope all those who have lost loved ones may also see themselves burn bright without a shadow of doubt, and find comfort in the possibility they are still here and watching over us.
December 31, 2020