I read 'The Cancer Journals' by Audre Lorde earlier in the week and, though she was talking about the individual experience of having breast cancer, her words about how sudden illness impacts all facets of yourself stood out. She describes 'the agony of an involuntary reorganisation of my entire life' following a negative diagnosis. This resonated very much in terms of how many people lost out with lockdown. However, she also says: 'But within those three weeks, I was forced to look upon myself and my living with a harsh and urgent clarity that has left me shaken but still stronger'. I hope this will apply as we recover from Covid-19.
August 4, 2020
The biggest way the pandemic has affected my life this week is again, my university. Last Thursday they announced that most students (other than first years, and I am a sophomore) would once again be fully online and unable to live on campus during the spring semester (Jan-May). I am deeply devastated by this news, especially because my school is split into two campuses and next semester would have been my last at the first campus. Additionally, I have only seen one friend from school since the pandemic began, and I miss the rest of my friends greatly. It has been so strange to adjust to life as a college student without a social life, club activities, office hours, hanging out on the quad, and eating in the dining hall. I am mourning the loss of that once again, just like I did in March and August. So this week I have been scrambling a bit to figure out where I'll be living next semester, if there is any way to make this feel more normal while still being safe, and yearning to see the friends I haven't seen in 8 months.
October 21, 2020