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Talk about what brings you happiness these days.
One thing that brings me happiness is creating abstract artwork in old school Photoshop 5.5 using the Kai's Power Tools plug-in called Texture Explorer. Before the pandemic I was thinking of resurrecting my Titanium G4 Powerbook from 2001 and running some of the KPT visionary software that has since been abandoned. The entire process of getting the computer working in the first place made me pretty happy, and now I create a few of these cellular landscapes each day, listening to music and getting lost in the process. They each take about an hour because the CPU processing is limited to 68K and there's a lot of waiting, but it's worth it. I create them and they remind me of the way we have all changed in the past year, how we have become more aware of living life on a molecular level with differing influences as we change our behavior. I'm trying to make that awareness beautiful.
April 8, 2021
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How is the coronavirus pandemic affecting your life right now? Tell us about your experiences, feelings, and thoughts.
This past week I was back on service. This was the second week on service in a three week stretch - on/off/on. Three weeks ago, my service was predominantly psych cases - I felt I was being asked to practice psychiatry, which is not my specialty nor a specific interest. This burned me out. I spent the week in between with belly pain - ultimately diagnosed with an ovarian cyst but I do believe much of the worsening of the pain was due to stress. Then back to the hospital - this time long hours caring for patients who may never leave the hospital. I miss the sense of accomplishment with which I used to leave my job. It feels like I'm living in a hamster wheel - trying my best to keep up but just running in a circle. And missing that connection and sense of accomplishment from my work.
July 6, 2020