I love Rick Astley! Yesterday, when I was bored out of my mind, I poured over his music videos on YouTube. The songs helped me to momentarily return to the '80s when life was simpler, clothing styles were horrendous, and I was 20 pounds lighter. Then I read about the continued popularity of “rick-rolling”—when a seemingly innocent hyperlink to some relevant site or additional information instead leads to a link to Astley’s music video “Never Gonna Give You Up.” Suddenly, I realized that since March 2020, the whole world has been rick-rolled. Well, maybe not actually rick-rolled, but perhaps COVID-rolled. No matter where you wanted to go or what you wanted to do, an ominous, unwanted COVID-19 “link” would always pop up. A wedding? Sorry, you’ve been COVID-rolled. A birthday party? Again, COVID-rolled. How about a funeral? Family reunion? Haircut? Airline flight? An outing for groceries? Yup, COVID-rolled again. (In the interest of transparency, I might or might not have been joyously swigging after-Christmas wine while warbling along with Rick and cursing COVID.) I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling Gotta make you understand (It's) Never gonna go away Never gonna set you free Always gonna float around and infect you Always gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Always gonna spread those germs that affect you.
January 7, 2021
We're planning for my son's 3rd birthday party right now, and we still have a lot of unvaccinated family. A lot of people are having parties and going to weddings and flying on planes, but with my unvaccinated child, we're still trying to be careful. I'm so angry when I see people blatantly disregarding the guidelines that have been suggested to keep each other safe, and I'm constantly weighed down by feelings of people being selfish. I'm sad for my toddler who has missed out on so much. He doesn't remember going to the aquarium or going to church or doing all the things I used to do with him. Previously we spent less time home than we did out, and now the exact opposite is true. We don't go anywhere or do anything, and now that the mask mandate in NJ has been lifted, I don't foresee us going anywhere in the near future. I'm so stressed out about everything, and many people are looking to move on despite the fact that the pandemic is still very real. When I applied for life insurance last year, they asked if I had ever tested positive for covid-19, so I can't even imagine what kinds of discriminatory practices or long-term health issues will transpire in the future for those who have had the virus. I'm trying to do all that I can to keep my son safe, and it's exhausting.
June 8, 2021