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How is the coronavirus pandemic affecting your life right now? Tell us about your experiences, feelings, and thoughts.
This was a booklet in the Hospice room of my best friend for 50 years. I watched her as she died for 4 days. It was traumatic for me and I was told I had to leave the building on one occasion because, due to COVID, only 4 visitors per patient were allowed. The other 4 all knew each other from Florida so I volunteered to leave the room, but the Hospice people made me go out into the cold. I went out to my car because it was cold and I was not prepared to go outside when told I had to leave immediately. I cried in the car, then drove away for a while. I was already hurting because my friend was dying, but this unecessarily harsh rote adherence to a rule hurt my feelings. I watched the stages of dying alone except for the nurses.
December 6, 2021
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Let's talk about sleep. How have you been sleeping recently?
Thanks for asking - terribly! There people in my life right now struggling with, and dying from, cancer. We don’t even see friends right now because it’s just too cold and we follow Fauci very strictly. (We have the luxury to be able to and we also make safe choices - like not hugging my mom just because we want to). It’s a cold, dark winter. I wake up several times a night. Cold dry air doesn’t help but there is this underlying sense of dread in me that is always there just beneath the surface. I am afraid it will never go away because I am in my mid 40’s and “it’s all down hill from here.” I know part of that is BS but seeing more people I care about get sick is very sobering. So yeah - not sleeping which makes me crankier than usual and kind of depressed. It sucks.
February 2, 2021