This is a picture of the fire in my wood stove. I see a canine figure, like the head of a wolf looking to the right, the eye glowing the teeth glowing and flames arising from the forehead and snout. My sister who has made a living as an artist could not see it. My dad would have seen it had he been alive. I spend a lot of time looking at the fire these days. I love the fire because it keeps me warm and I'm home a lot, which I like. What I see in this picture shows me that other people don't see what I see, or feel how I feel, being home in the pandemic. Even at that, I am really tired of this pandemic. I'm tired of wearing a mask which I always do. I'm tired of not being able to go anywhere. And I can't find my dogs prescription food. While I enjoyed being home in the beginning, like everyone else I'm just really tired now.
January 19, 2022
I'm feeling so exhausted by the constant need to decide between viral exposure and starvation.
May 4, 2021