Why is everything so hard? This week, a friend came out to visit. She didn't even stay with us, but the visit was exhausting, expensive, and time consuming. Have I forgotten how to be social? This photo is from Meow Wolf in Santa Fe. She said it was the best thing she did on her trip, so I was happy about that. But to me the day was stressful and unnerving at the same time. Too much of my mental space is taken up with comparing how things used to be, pre-Covid, and how they are now. It seems like everything before was easy and cheap. Going out now there are roadblocks and barriers. It's aggravating, but of course there is no going back. I have to figure out how to be grateful and happy to be able to do things at all.
June 25, 2021
Community? What community? I never see anyone. In some ways, yes. But even in my cohousing community, it mostly feels as though people are looking after themselves, and community discussion about COVID is mostly about the higher-risk people making sure they are not put at risk by others. All framed as 'keeping the community safe" of course. People probably do things I don't see: shop for our elders, etc. There was a charged discussion about whether someone needed to tell the community if they got sick. Mostly everyone makes their own decisions about risk.
December 19, 2020